Truth vs. Translation: How Rewriting My Story Saved My Future
We all have stories we tell ourselves. Sometimes, these stories are rooted in truth, but often they’re distorted translations shaped by shame and FEAR: False Expectations Appearing Real. For me, one of these stories almost cost me the love of my life.
Let me take you back to a pivotal moment in my life. After my divorce, I found myself navigating uncharted waters as a single parent. Buying my first home, managing household expenses, and raising my children without financial support was overwhelming. My needs grew faster than my paycheck, and before I knew it, I had accrued five figures of debt.
That debt carried a weight far heavier than just dollars and cents—it carried debilitating shame. To me, it wasn’t just debt. It was evidence that I had failed.
The Truth vs. My Translation
The truth was straightforward: I had incurred debt during a difficult transition in my life. But the translation I assigned to it was far more damaging: I’m terrible at managing money. I’m irresponsible. I’m a financial burden to anyone who loves me.
When my now-husband and I began dating seriously, I knew I had to share this part of my story. But the fear of how he might see me was paralyzing. Would he view me as irresponsible? Would he think I was unworthy of building a life together? These questions consumed me. I let that fear drive my actions. I started pulling back, smothered by my shame and creating distance between us. My translation of the truth—this belief that my financial situation defined my worth—almost ended us.
Rewriting the Story
What changed everything was vulnerability. With his support, I started to rewrite the story I was telling myself.
The new translation? I incurred debt because I did my best with what I had during a time of hardship. I prioritized my family’s needs and took care of what mattered most. And now, with a plan and help, I can overcome this obstacle and start fresh.
Together, we tackled the problem. I committed to a budget and embraced the resources and support available to me. Slowly but surely, I climbed out of debt, but more importantly, I climbed out of the shame that had been weighing me down.
The Power of Changing Your Translation
Looking back, I realize how easy it is to let negative translations spiral into self-fulfilling prophecies. The truth of my financial situation wasn’t what almost cost me my future—it was the story I told myself about it. I had turned a temporary hardship into a narrative about my worth and capabilities.
If I had continued to believe that story, I might not have married the man I love today. I might still be stuck in that cycle of guilt and shame, unable to see the opportunity for growth that was right in front of me.
Your Story Is Yours to Write
We all face truths that are difficult to confront—failures, setbacks, or moments when life feels too big to handle. But it’s not the truth itself that holds us back; it’s how we translate it.
Are you telling yourself a story of shame, guilt, or failure? Or are you using the truth to inspire growth, resilience, and possibility?
The next time you find yourself stuck in a negative translation, pause. Identify the truth, recognize the story you’re telling about it, and ask yourself: What’s a more empowering way to see this? How can I rewrite this story to move forward?
Life’s truths will always come with challenges, but when we choose translations that reflect our strength and resilience, we unlock the power to grow and create a brighter future. My story—and my marriage—are living proof of that. What’s your next translation going to be?